 
Entre Nous is a San Jose Bay Area lesbian newsletter.
Love can only go so far in keeping a relationship strong; I feel that trusting your partner and compromise has been the key to our relationship. Liz and I never gave up on each other and decided early in our relationship we wanted a permanent commitment to one another. Having a sense of humor is essential in keeping partners from taking themselves too seriously.
Twenty years ago Liz and I met in a library class while attending college in San Diego. I was married at the time, but nevertheless was drawn to this blond woman with sparkling blue eyes with a wicked sense of humor. I wanted to be with her all the time and I finally came to the realization that I had fallen in love with her. I left my husband of five years and moved in with Liz.
During our twenty years we experienced many adventures. Raising our daughter Laura (now 24) proved to be both rewarding and stressful. Moving to the Bay Area (15 years ago) was one of the best things we every did. Over the past years we have been involved in NOW, Billy De Frank Center, Sisterspirit Book Store and several political activities.
About a year ago we talked about having a really big party for our twentieth anniversary. We finally decided to have a wedding. Early on we thought we lacked funds for such an event, but I came into money unexpectedly. So, the wedding plans continued. Rings were bought, a cake was ordered and we selected the Unitarian Church in San Jose to conduct the ceremony.
Tragedy struck in mid October. The church we selected was severely damaged by fire. All of our plans had to change, invitations had already gone out and we scrambled to find a location on such short notice. We had to move the wedding outside. It would be risky in late November, but we kept our fingers crossed. On our day the weather was perfect.
Our wedding was the best thing we ever did for our relationship. Proclaiming our love and devotion to one another in the presence of friends and family was a beautiful experience. We recommend it.
Love is a given in any successful relationship. But I think that a sense of humor is almost as important, along with having a partner who is good natured and allows me to tell humorous stories about her at her expense! Now that is love!
About a year ago, Rose and I discussed what we wanted to do for our 1995 anniversary.
Because November 26, 1995, was our twenthieth year together, we wanted to make it special.
We decided on a Holy Union and selected the "First Unitarian Church" in dowtown San Jose as the
place to hold the ceremony. As with most things in our years together, the unexpected happened,
and the lovely historic church burned a little over a month before our ceremony. We
were devasted over the loss of such a beautiful building and the site for our Holy Union.
We were also a bit panicked at having to make alternative plans with such little time.
However, as we have done for years, Rose and I got it together and we made other arrangements
and our Holy Union was beautiful!
On our first date, Rosie and I went to see the Mel Brooks' movie "Young Frankensten." The movie was a perfect beginning for us, and our lives together have been very much like a Mel Brooks' film forever after! Lots of laughs, a bit of slap-tick, some duds and disappointments, but always a good time for all!
Last updated 10/08/03 emosler@stanford.edu | |||||
Name: Rose Sebastian
