Most of the following were contributed by Geoffrey Skinner.

If we can keep a severed head alive-- : discorporation and U.S. patent 4,666,425 / by Chet Fleming. -- St. Louis : Polinym Press, c1988.
AJG1193 / QL950.5 .F54 1988 / Law Library.

If we'd wanted quiet, we would have raised goldfish : poems for parents / selected by Bruce Lansky. -- New York : Meadowbrook Press : Distributed by Simon & Schuster, c1994.
ocm29843378 / PS595 .P37 I35 1994 / OCLC.

If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead yet? / Cynthia Heimel. -- 1st ed. -- New York, NY : Atlantic Monthly Press, c1991.
ocm23016694 / PN6162 .H395 1991 / OCLC.

If you didn't want grits, how come you ordered breakfast? / Jake Vest. -- 1st ed. -- Orlando, FL : Sentinel Communications Co., 1990.
ocm23004612 / NC1429 .V48 1990 / OCLC.

If you're not here, please raise your hand : poems about school / Kalli Dakos ; illustrated by G. Brian Karas. -- 1st ed. -- New York : Four Winds Press, c1990.
ocm20932974 / PS3554 .A414 I37 1990 / OCLC.

--submitted by Brian Kunde

Originally published in SUL News Notes, Volume 3, Number 31, August 19, 1994. These titles reflect the compiler's notions of the humorous, wry, ironic or unusual, and should not be construed as reflecting any other opinion or judgment, including the editorial opinion of the original publisher.