Most Stanford students would prefer
Green had no portal monitor:
What student ever celebrates
These dragons who defend the gates,
Whose gimlet eyes perceive their crimes
And thwart their favorite designs?
What patron of those passing by
Goes not in dread that one might cry:
"Slow down, you! Let me see that pack!
This wasn't borrowed: put it back!
You know you can't bring in your lunch,
So hand it over. Thanks a bunch!
Your old I.D.'s no good this year,
You idiot: get outta here!
Go back outside to drink that Coke.
Hey, you! You aren't allowed to smoke!"
The monitor's feared ocular
Will never be too popular
Among the folk its owner's cowed
By barking words like these aloud.
Not one among the crowd would dare
To meet that hard and fearless glare,
Nor yet believe their foeman's creed:
"I'm here to serve you, yes indeed!"
Originally published in SUL News Notes, August 20, 1993.
c 1993, 1995 Fleabonnet Press for the author.