Why?: Because Hamlet created Shakespeare.

Interests outside of squash: Golf, soccer, reading, philosophizing, painting, sleeping, listening to Cantonese music.

One goal you would most like to meet this year: To improve 98% on my swing, 76% on tactics and 88% on fitness.

Something about you not many people know: I’m 99% space, and so are you.

Describe yourself in one word: Cromulent.

Favorite Stanford Squash Team Story: When F approaches infinity.

How did you get into Stanford, you idiot?: Still, I have lots of white hair, and I got the coolest last name.

One question to ask <insert Deity of choice>: Are you actually a lizard-kinda-reptile?

Complete this line: He that is master of himself will soon... realize that nothing is better than eternal happiness. A hot dog is better than nothing. So a hot dog is better than eternal happiness.

Crumple or fold: Crumple, because crumple = 3D and fold = 2D, and 3D>2D.