A "King of the Hill" format was used. Games were played to 15. The winner on court #1 advanced to play the winner on court #2. Losers rotated out to the queue to play on court #1. Points were awarded for games won (3 pts on court #2; 2 pts on court #1) or for games lost (2 pts on court #2; 1 pt on court #1).
| Player | KoH Points | Total Offense |
| Matt "Spammer" Hills | 9 | 52 |
| Aaron "the good hands guy" Plotnik | 8 | 55 |
| Will "Wheels" Anderson | 8 | 46 |
| Jesse "The Body" Fonner | 5 | 14 |
(*) KoH Points - the number of points earned in the King-of-Hill format.
(*) Total Offense - Total points scored this evening
| Court | Winner/Loser | Score |
| #1 | Matt / Will | 15-11 |
| #1 | Aaron / Jesse | 15-0 |
| #1 | Will / Jesse | 15-2 |
| #2 | Matt / Aaron | 15 - 11 |
| #1 | Aaron / Jesse | 15-3 |
| #2 | Matt / Will | 15 - 5 |
| #1 | Jesse / Matt | 9-7 |
| #2 | Will / Aaron | 15 - 14 |
Game #1: Will got first choice on matchups, so elected to play the Spammer before he warmed up (although anyone who knows what a sneaky lot spammers are would probably realize that he had warmed up on the other court; but apparently he hadn't practiced the lag--Will nailed the short line, while Matt's almost reached the receiving line. D'oh!) Matt's first return of serve was a ceiling ball, as he repeated his mantra of starting conservative. But this pretty much went out the window as the seductive booms of power shots sucked both players in. Matt was lucky to get up 4-1, but then he blinked, and was down 6-5. Will had been clinically efficient: drive serve to Matt's backhand, Matt salivates and nails a down-the-line, but with an overabundance of power (or altitude, I guess), setting Will up even more nicely off the back wall. Will's rekill came swift and sure--putting the ball out of its misery. Around then I had to leave the court to switch gloves, while Jack was talking to Will something about hinders. It must have distracted him a bit, as I never relinquished the lead after that (moral: block out the outside noises during a match), despite hitting "nothing but crosscourt" shots.
Game #2: Aaron "the good hands guy" Plotnik had just given Jesse a donut and was now challenging. In recent matches, the Spammer had been giving him fits with a half-lob Z serve, but he's apparently solved that riddle, moving up quickly to cut it off -- and even rolling out a return. Aaron once again earned his monicker, with his fast (yet steady) hands pretty much eating up everything left in the front court, but the spammer still had the edge with the passing game. Aaron would do well to take a page from Will "Wheels" Anderson's book--if a pass is hit hard enough to get past you, its probably gonna set up off the back wall, so burn some rubber and scoot after it!
Game #3: Will was back for more, after a 15-2 win over Jesse (notice that in first game Jesse had a donut--this upward trend will continue throughout the night). Unfortunately, the spammer was now determined to work on that z-serve, and Will hadn't compared notes with Aaron on how to deal with it yet. This is in stark contrast to how quickly Wheelie-boy jumps on any straight drive serve--forehand or backhand, he pounces, even nailing the short serves back to the front wall, "just in case it wasn't short" (he says). With an arsenal of serves, and a "Sudsy-like" Splat-roll-out, the game was finished decisively: 15-5. [Ed note: "Sudsy-like" should only be applied to the "do not try this at home" splat roll-outs from shoulder high, not the run-of-the-mill splat roll-out hit from thigh-high.]
Game #4: In the final rounds, we rounded out the matches, with Will vs. Aaron, and Jesse "the Body" Fonner vs. the spammer himself. First, the details of the Will/Aaron match are not known, other than the score. Second, I'd like to thank the others for getting Jesse thoroughly warmed up -- with a bit of running (mostly around his backhand) and a handful of well-placed roll-outs, he was up 9-7 when the game was called on account of time. Rumor has it that he wasn't really trying in the earlier games-- and that he was discussing the recent episodes of "Desperate Housewives" with Amber thoughout the matches... (Notice to world: Watch out once he develops a backhand!)
